What do you do when you find yourself in your twenties and realize that sex is something fun, adventurous and you have been missing out on a whole diverse world? You begin with the basics. Where did I start? The first place to start is to open your mind and your doors to the philosophy that anything is possible when exploring sex and the world is here to teach you. Another important belief to change, and to change quickly, is that the sex industry is dirty and something to avoid. A great resource to learn new techniques and to expand your sexual “tool chest” is porn and online sex writers.
When I let my preconceived notions about porn go, I found quickly that things got a lot more fun. One of the things that I wanted to explore more and do better was how to give a really great blow job. My goal? I was determined to give a mind-blowing blowjob. Sounds basic, right? I think dicks are intriguing, but because of “religious beliefs” I never had the opportunity or felt “permitted” to explore them and give them the attention that they deserved. In fact, when I first saw a man’s dick I remember thinking, “don’t stare, don’t stare!” Somehow, in my mind I thought if I didn’t really look at it, I wasn’t committing a sin. So, by getting rid of those notions, I was able to set out to explore dick and the “how tos” on giving a really great blow job.
Where to start? The first place to start is to find a volunteer who will let you get up close and personal with all the parts and things connected to it. Put your face down there, and run your cheek up and down. Lift things up and just get good with the exploration. Touch, poke, lick and prod. Let your volunteer know ahead of time you are in this for the longhaul and to relax and enjoy.
Next, do your research. If you don’t know want the glans is or what the Corpus Spongiosum is, you haven’t done your research and are missing out on understanding some important parts and how to appeal to the needs of these areas. Now, you can watch a lot of porn and get some techniques, but there is some great writing out there about giving a great blow job. One of my favorite sites is yourtango.com. Look up Sean Jameson’s article on “Tips for Giving Memorable Head.” Because, let’s be serious, you don’t want to just give head, you want the recipient to walk away, “blown” away – literally. Finally, my last advice is that it is never just about the sucking. It is about using your tongue, using both hands and making sure to use lots of spit. Get everything wet and moving and you won’t regret it. I find that if you are not using your mouth and both hands, you may need to up your game.
If like me, you have allowed religion and socially accepted norms to limit your exploration in the past, join me in discovering all the fun you have yet to find. Start with the basics and then go big. You won’t regret it.